Challenged but Definitely NOT Defeated

Yes, whenever I am away for very long something bad must have happened. This time it is a real challenging experience that changes my life forever; nothing beats this, not even having to go for dialysis 3 times a week. This is far worse but again, I am Superman - always challenged but never defeated.

I have been around after being 'jailed' @ Ampang Hospital for a month but couldn't find the slightest interest to blog. As usual I would have everything within reach even the Internet. I tell you being on MC for 3 months is really boring. Before that, woohoo, I got that new job I was telling you guys about many months ago - finally the offer came and I gladly tendered my resignation at the current company. A week after the offer came - this offer from God came and I had no choice but to accept it. So I am currently serving my 3 months notice on medical leave - thank goodness! See, there's always a silver lining behind bad things that happens. Whatever it is, Alhamdulillah for what Allah has given me, whether good or bad.

After the landslide at Bukit Antarabangsa in December I fell terribly ill, I couldn't walk for most of the week after Adiladha after a real bad fall in the toilet at my dad's place in Melawati. I laid on the recliner for a week and a blister on my rright foot turned gangrenous on the weekend after Aidiladha. The blister has been there for about a month and I've been doing home dressing twice a day for that period but ever since I came back from Umrah I have been caughing none stop and the week before the landslide the caught just got worse. I turned to Ubat Batuk Cap Ibu dan Anak which has honey ( a real NO NO for diabetics) and swallowed 2 big bottles of it. On the day the blister turned gangrenous and foul smelling my suger reading was at 33 mmol.

I decided to go to the Ampang emergecy on Monday morning 15 Dec 2008 and as I expected I had to be admitted and the gangrenous part had to eb removed - the little toe had to go as it was right above the blister. I was okay and accepted my fate. The surgery to remove the little toe and part of my right foot was done the next day.

My New 'Super' Vehicle - Cost Me RM800

A week after that, as the doctors had suspected and continuously warned me during their rounds every morning that my wound wasn't healing well (partly because of the renal failure I was suffering from that the healing process couldn't take place) the fourth toe had turned black and must be removed. I readily accepted my fate and signed the consent letter. During surgery the doctor told that the third had to be removed too and I agreed. Again, the doctors kept reminding me that they had no confident my foot will heal and advised for a BKA (below knee amputation) - I disagree and told them that as long as my toe and the second toe are okay, I wouldn;t let them do anymore surgery on me.

And true enough a week later the second toe had turned black - I had to finally succumb to my worst fears of losing a leg. my right leg was amputation below knee on 29th Dec 2008, a mere few days before the new year came. I had lost hope and was devastated but I kept telling myself at least God had given me time to think and if I were in a motor accident for instance, I may just lose a leg and would have no time to even sign a consent letter.

About a month had passed. I am hoepful that life would turn better for me especially with the new jpb coming - thank God they are ever willing to accept me even after the amputation and my current company, no matter how bad it is, the bosses have been very unnderstanding and helpful. I owe big time to KN for taking care of me while I was in the hospital. Also to my borther who took care of me on weekends at the hospital and the most important thing about all these is the realisation of the love of a dear father. Papa came everyday without fail and whenever I had to go into the OT he would be there for me.

I thank Allah for what had happened, even though it was painful but good things turned out from it. Do pray for me guys.

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2 comments:

Catz said...

hi Kal el,

i've visited ur blog selalu..waiting for ur new entry...and wonder why u senyap lama..sejak tragedi bukit antarabangsa tu..hari ni saya visit blog u dan rasa terkejut sangat...oh..tabahnya u hadapi dugaan Allah ini..the way u write u mcm tak kecewa langsung dgn apa yg terjadi...u sgt positif dan terima dgn redha dan tabah...and lucky u have KN and other family members who take care of u..saya amat kagum dgn cara u terima dugaan ini..sgt positif hingga saya sgt excited utk tulis komen ini..
apa pun Kal el, semua terjadi ada hikmahnya kan...dan i rasa u dah strong enough now ni...
saya sgt menanti entry-entry awak seterusnya...keep writing ya jika keadaan mengizinkan..

Kal El said...

Things hasn't been good for me ever since I came back from Umrah tapi Kal El terima semua ini sebagai dugaan dari Allah. I am not strong, believe me but there's nothing else I could do and thank God ada seorang yang amat menyayangi Kal El yang sentiasa memberikan Kal El semangat dan harapan. I always believe that there is a silver lining behind every bad things God has in store for us and that things happened for a reason. Tapi yang paling penting, Kal El sentiasa anggap diri ini Superman sebab tu I'm never defeated. Semua itu disamping doa dari keluarga dan rakan-rakan dapat membantu Kal El menghadapi hidup yang penuh cabaran.

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